by Dr. Kristin Neff , Ph.D.

“Treat yourself like you would treat your best friend”

Introduction

       The above quote sounds so easy to do but the reality is that it is hard to execute. When our best friend is suffering or distraught we would never say, “You are so stupid, why did you ever do that? Don’t you know any better? Stop being a baby and feeling sorry for yourself. ” No, we would most likely come up to them, put our arms around them and console them by saying, ” It’s ok, everyone makes mistakes. The world goes on and tomorrow will be another day, another opportunity to do better.” Why is it then, when we make mistakes, we often treat ourselves and engage in self talk like the former example and not the latter. Why do we treat ourselves cruelly, expect so much more and hold ourselves to a higher standard than we do others? For most of us, it comes naturally to show compassion to those that are suffering but it does not come so naturally to show self-compassion when we feel the same way.
        Dr. Kristin Neff’s book, “Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself,” attempts to answer why we don’t show more self-compassion to ourselves and why showing ourselves self-compassion is more important and healthier for us than having high self-esteem. Dr. Neff then discusses how to effectively implement self-compassion into our daily lives.
       This book is a powerful self help book that will change your perspective on how you should treat yourself to deal in a productive way with stressful and unpleasant situations. You may be surprised what a little self-compassion can do to help you live a happier and healthier life. Read more…

“Man’s Search for Meaning”

                                                 by Viktor Frankl

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom”

                If the above quote does not make you want to read this mesmerizing  book then read on because it gets better. Viktor Frankl’s bestselling legendary book just keeps on giving. The book is divided into two parts. The first is titled, “Experiences in a Concentration Camp” and though he does give graphic description of the “hell” he lived through while incarcerated, Frankl focuses more on how he, as a  psychotherapist, observed and interpreted how the human psyche coped and survived. It is a tough first 93 pages to read but does effectively set up the second part titled, “Logotherapy in a Nutshell”.  Logotherapy, (Logo is Greek for “Meaning”), is the psychotherapy  that he developed. Over the last 53 pages of the book  he explains his theory, and on almost every page there is a nugget of wisdom to be absorbed.

                With this review it is my hope that I do this very powerful book the justice it deserves. It  has the power to help enhance your personal life and the interaction you have with others, but it also has the potential to have a significant effect on a greater scale, for as he says in the last two sentences :

“Since Auschwitz we know what man is capable of.

And since Hiroshima we know what is at stake.”

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Mindfulness means being aware, to focus your attention on what is talking place right now, fully and completely. It means to live in the moment, not to judge the moment but to see each moment as a new beginning, a new opportunity to start over, to tune in, and to reconnect.

Practicing mindfulness involves stopping all the “doing” in your life and relax into the present without trying to fill it up with anything. The goal is to purposefully allow your body and mind to come to rest in the moment, no matter what is “on” your mind or how your body feels. This means allowing yourself to be in the moment with things exactly as they are, without trying to change anything. Read more…

Reference: Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness

By: Jan Kabat-Zin, Ph.D.

Mindfulness means being aware, living intentionally, fully and completely, from moment to moment. It means to live in the moment, not to judge the moment but to see each moment as a new beginning, a new opportunity to start over, to tune in, and to reconnect.

Practicing mindfulness involves stopping all the “doing” in your life and relax into the present without trying to fill it up with anything. The goal is to purposefully allow your body and mind to come to rest in the moment, no matter what is “on” your mind or how your body feels. This means allowing yourself to be in the moment with things exactly as they are, without trying to change anything.

You need to practise mindfulness in order to reap its benefits (table 1). The more systematically and regularly you practice, the more the power of mindfulness will grow and the more of its benefits will be experienced.

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Reference: Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness

By: Jan Kabat-Zin, Ph.D.

The focus you have when you practise mindfulness, paying attention to the present moment and seeing things as they are without trying to change them, through mediation is crucial. If your energy and commitment to practice is low, it will be hard to develop calmness and relaxation with any consistency.

As well, your attitude that you bring to the practice of mindfulness will, to a large extent, determine the long-term value of mindfulness. Keeping particular attitudes in mind is actually part of mindfulness training and sets the stage for what is possible by being mindful.

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